Subject: NEW: Truth OK, for everyone who read Fragile...here's something totally different. Rated R for violence (mild). This is a relationship story, so please stop reading if that kind of thing upsets you! Also, there is sex (Although nothing graphic) between Mulder and Scully. All characters belong to 1013 and you guys all know the rest of that stuff. Truth by Leyla Harrison I knew that any minute she would come hurtling around the corner, looking for me. I had heard her calling my name but couldn't answer her. There seemed to be something wrong with my voice. Then I saw it happen before I could even speak. The man grabbed her as she rounded the corner. She didn't even see him. I felt a tightness in my chest. It was me; I was supposed to be protecting her from this, and I couldn't even move. I might as well have been pinned to the wall with iron shackles. I couldn't help her. The man grabbed her arm, then as she whirled around in shock, he grabbed her under her arms and picked her up. She saw me against the wall and her eyes were wide with surprise and terror. He slammed her into the wall, and I head the crack as her skull made contact with the concrete. I tried to scream, but found my voice trapped in my throat. She slumped down the stone wall, her blue eyes now closed, a stain of blood from her head following her down the wall into a sitting position. She landed on the floor and her head flopped over to one side, limp like a rag doll. I opened my mouth to scream, but instead I vomited, turning my head away from her. *** MONDAY - 7:00am SEASIDE MOTEL, PERCY, VIRGINIA "Jesus!" Mulder gasped, sitting up in bed and breathing heavily. He was drenched with sweat, and he could feel his heart racing. It had been so vivid...and for once, not about Samantha. As he got up, shaved and showered in the hotel bathroom, he couldn't get the dream out of his head. Scully's face, her features slack and her head and body slumped over....it was so strongly disturbing that he twice had to lean against the wall of the shower and close his eyes for support. It made him dizzy. He finally stepped out of the shower and dressed, casually, because this was going to be a long day for them, a day thankfully short on interviews but long on investigation. He took his wallet, ID and gun and slipped the room key into his pocket before heading down the hall to Scully's room. He knocked on the door. "Come on in," she called from behind the door, "it's unlocked." Mulder opened the door and came inside. He was dismayed to see that Scully's room was larger than his, had an extra bed and a view of the waterfront instead of the street. She was sitting at the desk, her laptop up and running. She was already dressed and had her hair pulled back into a casual ponytail, and her glasses were on. She was typing fast and furious, but looked up as Mulder entered. "How come you always end up with a nicer room than I do?" he asked. "I get an upgrade," she said, taking a swig of coffee. "On the Bureau's tab?" he asked incredulously. He couldn't imagine Skinner allowing that. "No, Mulder, on my own tab. Unlike you, I do have good credit." He tossed his head at her, giving her a little smirk at her barb. "So, anything good?" he asked. "I was just reading about the effects of different anti-depressants on the brain, and other side effects. Mulder, Mrs. Linder was on three different anti-depressants, and was also taking strong sedatives. The things she claims to have seen on the locked ward could simply be hallucinations from over-medication." Scully said to him. "Scully, if she said she saw men in black suits, wouldn't that strike you as a bit strange in a psychiatric ward?" Mulder wasn't about to give up this fight so easily. "There have been two disappearances in that hospital in the last week. And this isn't the first time that patients there have been saying they've seen men in black. It's just the first time anyone's been listening to them." "We should probably look into the records of the other patients who claim to have seen them," Scully said, "to see what kind of medicine they were taking at the time. And then we can go and talk to Mrs. Linder again." She stood up and headed for the dresser, putting her holster on and a coat. Mulder tried not to stare at her. It was hard not to. He almost would forget how beautiful she was sometimes. When she was dressed for business, in her suits, she looked so...normal. Or maybe it was the environment. It was hard for him to notice anything when he was working. But sometimes he would notice her in the midst of things. She would unconsciously tuck her hair behind her ear, and he would see her high cheekbones. She would stand up and he would catch a glimpse of her calf, contained by the sheer stockings she wore. He could imagine running one hand along that silkiness... But these thoughts didn't bother him right now. Right now he was watching her and thinking about the dream he had about her. About her being dead. About her being killed, and about him being powerless to help her. He would die before he ever let anyone hurt her. "Mulder?" she asked a second time, and he blinked. "Sorry," he answered, snapping out of his reverie. It was hard to keep his thoughts balanced. From one minute, thinking about Scully as an attractive woman; to the next minute, thinking of her in his dream. "Mulder, are you OK?" she asked, her eyes narrowing on him. He was acting so strange, she thought. OK, well, stranger than usual. "I'm fine, Scully, really," he answered, and led the way to the door. They drove for about 45 minutes to the building where Fairhaven Hospital's psychiatric records were housed. It turned out to be a self-service storage facility. They identified themselves and were given a key to the storage site. It was a large area, housed in a stand alone warehouse building. Mulder unlocked the door and stepped inside, Scully behind him. The room was set up like a maze, with cartons and filing cabinets stacked up everywhere. "Nice," Mulder muttered under his breath. Scully made her way into the maze slowly. Mulder watched her for a moment, and then she disappeared. "Scully?" he called, his eyes catching sight of the concrete walls and his stomach beginning to clench nervously. "Hey, Scully, where did you go?" "I'm right here," she called back, but her voice was muffled and then he heard a deafeningly loud crashing noise followed by a cry of pain. "Scully!" he yelled, his heart pounding. Oh, God, no, please, he thought as he tried to determine just where she was. Stacks of files and cartons fell around his as he turned corners too quickly. "Scully!" Fear was overwhelming him. Anyone could be hiding out in this old building, it was so large. Anyone waiting around a corner... Mulder turned the corner and found Scully down on the floor, her leg twisted out unnaturally underneath her. He had been half-expecting to find her bloodied and broken as he had in his dream. "Mulder," she gasped, "it's my ankle." He breathed a sigh of relief and even hesitated before bending down to help her. He was OK, he reassured himself and then hurried to her side. His heart was still pounding wildly. "What happened?" "Some of those damn cartons...fell on my ankle." She winced as Mulder helped her sit up. "Are you OK?" "Yeah," she muttered, "but I think it's sprained or something. Help me stand up." "Scully, if it's broken, shouldn't we get you to a doctor or--" he shut up when he saw her face. "Mulder, I am a doctor," she answered sharply. "I know, I meant, maybe we should go to the emergency room and have it x-rayed." "No, let's just get the files we need and get out of here. I can ice it at the hotel," she answered and shooed him away towards the cartons and file cabinets that were beyond her reach. "Go on, get the files." Mulder obediently started off, trying to make some sense out of the bizarre filing system. There was no understanding it. Cartons and even loose files were everywhere, and not even the file cabinets seemed to be in some kind of alphabetical order. He glanced over his shoulder at Scully once, but she was bending over, examining her foot, and didn't see him. It gave him a few moments respite to think about his reaction. He couldn't help it. The dream had been so vivid, so real in his mind, as if Scully really was dead, or going to die, or some such nonsense. Crazy, he thought to himself, I am going absolutely crazy. Maybe she's right, he continued telling himself, maybe I do need a day off. Or a vacation. He finally came upon a carton of files that seemed somewhat recent. He pulled the lid off and began poking through them. He didn't find anything even close to the time period when the other two witnesses had reported seeing the men in black. He tried another carton and was rewarded. "Hmmm," he mused aloud and pulled a few patient files. The two witnesses names were already ingrained in his razor sharp memory, and a few other names of patients who reportedly heard recollections of the witnesses were floating somewhere just beyond his grasp. He was hoping that by seeing the names, he would remember. Finally satisfied that he had gotten all that he was going to get with the files, he put the lid back on the carton and made his way back over to Scully. She was now sitting on a stack of cartons, looking miserable. "Find anything?" she asked, and he nodded. "I can't believe these are patient records, they way they are kept," she said to him, looking around, her eyes filled with angry amazement. "I know. It looks like they started keeping them in file cabinets, but someone must have gotten bored. They just must have come in and dumped cartons in every so often," he answered, and helped her to her feet. He put an arm around her without thinking about it. She looked up at him, a little surprised. "You can't walk by yourself, now can you?" he asked. Scully arched an eyebrow at him. He didn't say anything more, just grinned at her in amusement. "Come on, let me help you." She sighed heavily and leaned against him, letting him arm encircle her shoulder while she slipped one of her own arms around his waist. She knew it felt strange but somewhat comforting, and she let him walk with her as she limped slowly back to the car. At the car, he went around and unlocked her door for her, helping her in, even reaching in and putting her seatbelt on, leaning over her body. He was so close that she knew he could feel her breath on his neck. He snapped the seatbelt in and went around to his side of the car and got in. "That really wasn't necessary," she said to him once they started driving. "I am fully capable of buckling my own seatbelt." Mulder feigned being hurt. "But you're injured, Scully," he answered. She looked at him, trying to figure him out. She had caught him staring at her more than once that day so far, and he had certainly been acting strange enough. She could still smell the scent of his skin; it had been so dizzyingly close to her that it was intoxicating. She could almost picture herself tilting her head up, just an inch or two, and kissing his neck, putting her lips against that warm skin... But she could imagine, couldn't she? The tension that usually passed between them would wax and wane, sometimes stronger than others. This time was definitely one of the stronger times. They were both silent, letting thoughts of unspoken words hang in the air. ***** MONDAY - 1:00pm SEAVIEW MOTEL Scully refused to let Mulder help her to her room, instead, she stubbornly limped along the pathway with Mulder behind her. Finally she got to the room, turning the key in the lock and stopping to see Mulder standing, leaning against the wall, watching her. "Are you going to let me come in and help you?" he asked. "I know you don't want to walk all the way back to the ice machine like that." She let her breath out. He was right, she didn't want to. The pain in her foot was throbbing unmercifully, and she just wanted to lie down for a while. "OK, you get the ice and I'll start going through the files," she finally acquiesed. He followied her into the room, taking the ice bucket and going out into the hall again, his heart thudding in his chest. What they hell, he thought, we've spent countless hours together in one of our hotel rooms before, going through files. Why am I feeling like this? In the room, Scully managed to get her shoes off. Her ankle was already beginning to discolor and had swelled up considerable. She gently touched the bones of her ankle, trying to make sure none were broken. Finally satisfied, she sat down on the bed and leaned her head against the headboard, staring at her own reflection in the mirror on the bureau across from the bed. She hated her behavior. She was deliberately trying to keep Mulder away from her because there was some tension in the air. "So what," she said aloud. There's always been tension. She looked at her reflection critically in the mirror until Mulder walked back in. He had filled the ice bucket and went to get towels from the bathroom. He sat down on the bed next to her. "Well, this is a switch," he remarked as he filled the towel with ice and wrapped it against her ankle. "What do you mean?" "You're usually the one who does the doctoring in this relationship." Mulder bit his tongue at the mention of the R-word. He looked up. Scully was definitely blushing. "Can you get me my purse?" she asked obviously shaken my his comment. She pointed at it on the bureau. "I think I've got some Tylenol in there." He got up, brought her purse back to her, sat down. Her legs were stretched out straight, and he placed one hand on the calf of her injured leg and massaged it gently. The sensation was incredible. It sent waves of excitement through her body. She was having a hard time getting the pill bottle open. When she finally did, her hands trembled and pills tumbled out. "What's wrong?" he asked, his voice soft. She looked up at him. There was no mistaking the look in his eyes. Oh, Mulder, she thought, if you start this, we won't be able to stop it. Mulder swallowed hard. Her blue eyes were fixed on his face, her skin flushed slightly. He knew that this was it, the moment they had been avoiding, anticipating, dreading for years. They both knew that eventually it would come. Mulder knew that if he didn't make a move now, he could forget it. They would both go back to burying their feelings, and God only knew how long it would take to bring them back to the surface like this again. He put one hand up to touch her face, her skin, and his hand cupped against her jaw line. She tilted her head so that her face was in his hand, and she closed her eyes briefly, letting the sheer power of the moment take her. Her head felt light, dizzy, almost. She opened her eyes just as he leaned in to kiss her. At the moment his lips touched hers, she responded. The kissing was light, restrained, but he was exploring every part of her lips with his, and this gradually led to more passion. The pill bottle fell from her hand as did the pills and she wrapped her arms around his neck instinctively, needing him closer to her. He put a hand in her hair, running through it, bringing his lips to the base of her neck, moving up to behind her ear, leaving a trail of hot breath on her skin. Scully felt her heartbeat increasing, and she could hear Mulder's breaths coming quicker. Mulder felt Scully pulling him, down onto the bed, onto her, and he pushed her purse aside, pushed at the pillows, lacing his fingers through her hair and holding her head, helping her into a lying position. He heard the pills hitting the floor, little noises, and then the noise of the pill bottle also bouncing onto the thin carpet. He kissed her harder, feeling her response. Scully felt him atop her, forgetting about the pain in her ankle. She had denied herself from this for far too long. All this time, pretending that she didn't care about him like this, hiding her true feelings for him from everyone, including herself...and yet she had always fantasized, always hoped that maybe, somehow, there would someday be something between them besides friendship. She had always felt this way about him. There was some kind of a bond between them, there always was. And now he was holding her in this bed, in this motel room, kissing her, running his hands up her body, fully clothed, along her sides, over her stomach, and she was trembling. Mulder slowed down the kiss a little, wanting to savor it, her. He could smell traces of her perfume on her neck, feel her erratic breathing against his chest. He stopped kissing her and she opened her eyes, startled, as he cupped her breast through her shirt. "Mulder," she sighed, closing her eyes as sensation coursed through her veins. He watched her arch her back when he slipped a cool hand under her shirt, touching her skin directly. Her mouth was open slightly, and ke kissed her bottom lip, pulling on it gently with his mouth. She's so incredibly beautful, he thought. How could I have been so stubborn? Why did I wait so long? Then, suddenly, the gravity of what they were doing hit Scully with a smack. She opened her eyes to find Mulder beginning to unbutton her flannel shirt. "Mulder, wait," she whispered, breathless, her fingers flying up to stop him. He stopped, and looked at her. "What are we doing?" "What we've wanted to do," he answered simply. She nodded, knowing he was right. "But, Mulder, we can't do it," she said to him, her voice filled with pain. He stayed very still for a moment, then sat up, releasing her. As he did, Scully felt her heart aching. "I want to, Mulder," she told him. He nodded. "I do too, Scully," he said to her regretfully. He knew as well as she that by crossing that line, they would never be able to turn back. There were so many things he wanted to say to her. He wanted to tell her that he loved her. He wanted to tell her that he had loved her for so long now, but that his fear and stupidity had gotten in the way. She got up from the bed, rearranging the ice carefully. She was calm now, her rational side returning. She knew that it couldn't happen again. It wouldn't happen again. But there was a nagging inside her, a feeling that she knew that she was lying to herself. And there was nothing she hated more than lying. She didn't want to look at him, didn't want to see his face, filled with emotion. It would scare her. It would make her want to just say screw the world, who cares about my job, this is the man I love. But she couldn't do it. And so she didn't look at him. Mulder watched her as she rearranged her makeshift ice pack. She seemed absorbed in making sure all the ice cubes were arranged in the same direction. He knew it was a front, that she was feeling what he was feeling but was afraid to admit it. Please, Scully, he thought, look at me, just for a second, so I know you care. She finally looked up at him, and the minute she saw his face, her heart melted, but it scared her. She realized that her eyes were locked to his, that she couldn't tear herself away. He leaned in and kissed her very gently, and she kissed him back. The physical charge that went through her body ruptured something in her mind, and she pulled away, tears in her eyes. "Scully," he implored her, "we've hidden this for far too long. You know that." She nodded her head. She did know, but she was still scared. Skinner would likely toss them both out of the Bureau if he ever found out about this. She wanted to be with him, so badly. Come on, she prodded herself, let your feelings be your guide for once. This time it was her who kissed him, and with a ferociousness that startled them both. It was an intense kiss that let him know exactly what she wanted. She was pulling at his clothes. "Scully," he gasped in between kisses, "are you--" but she cut him off. "Shhh," she told him, kissing his lips and nipping at his earlobe gently. "Condom?" he managed to get out, and she stopped short. He reached into his back pocket and pulled out his wallet, and fished a battered looking packet from it. He checked it quickly. "Doesn't expire for another 4 months." "You only have one?" she asked him playfully, knowing that they would have to get more, and quickly. He caught a look at her eyes, and they were filled with love and desire and passion, and it more than he could have ever hoped for or dreamed of. He reached for her, and their first time was quick,. and ended too soon for both of them. Later, they made love again and again into the evening, slowly, so they could really see each others bodies and souls for the first time. ****** TUESDAY - 1:30am SEASIDE MOTEL Sometime in the middle of the night, Scully awoke. She opened her eyes slowly and saw Mulder, his bare chest rising and falling rhythmically in the peacefulness of sleep. For a moment, she was transfixed by that sight, relieved, almost, knowing that it was likely the first good night of sleep he had experienced in a long time. Then she took in the reality of what had happened between them the night before. It was something that made her blush, just thinking about it. And that was when the panic set in. Her own breathing quickened, and her heartbeat sped up until it was pounding unmercifully in her chest. She slipped out of bed, making as little movement as possible, trying not to wake him. She looked around for something to wear amidst the clutter of their clothes on the floor. She finally settled for Mulder's shirt. She limped into the bathroom, quietly shutting the soor behind her. Her foot was still sore, although it was much better than it had been the previous day. At least now she could walk on it. She surveyed herself in the mirror critically. Well, she thought, her hair was a mess, but at least the small amount of makeup she had worn wasn't smeared on her face. It was strange. She looked different to herself somehow. She stared back at the reflection of her eyes in the mirror. They seemed clearer. Her head felt clearer. Everything felt wonderful. So why did she have a knot in her stomach? Don't be crazy, she chided herself. You know why. Because you and Mulder just made love. There was almost a dividing line between the arousal that thought brought up and the dread. There was no turning back now for them, no saying that it just happened in the heat of passion and would never happen again. She thought for a moment that it would probably be easier that way, if they could just make love in an explosion of unresolved sexual tension and then wake up and go back to normal. Scully knew that Mulder was in no way ready for a "relationship". She didn't think she was, either. Of course, there was the problem of their jobs--they couldn't tell Skinner, he'd fire them both. She wasn't sure that she wanted a nice house somewhere with a few kids running around and a dog and a two car garage. She did want that, but not quite yet. The last two years she and Mulder had worked together had robbed her somewhat of a personal life. And she wanted some of it back before she plunged herself into some marriage to Fox Mulder. She stopped herself short. Whoa, Dana, slow down, she thought. They had made love. It wasn't like he had proposed. She knew that she would have. No matter what she wanted in life, Scully knew that without Mulder in her life, she wouldn't have much of a life to speak of. There really wasn't anything much to compare her time with him to. She had experienced some of the best times and worst times in her life with him. She trusted him more than anyone else. She counted on him. Without him, things seemed bleak. So if he proposes? she wondered. Scully suddenly chuckled to herself. Dana, my dear, you need to get laid more often, she thought. Here she was thinking that after one roll in the hay with her, Mulder would be on his knees proposing. Like she was that good in bed. Sure. Scully heard some movement in the outer room and felt butterflies in her stomach beginning to form. Now, she thought, now we have to talk. She came out of the bathroom, tucking a wisp of hair behind her ear unconsciously to find Mulder sitting on the edge of the bed. He had luckily had the thought to put on his boxer shorts, but even the sight of his bare chest made her heart beat faster. He smiled at her. "If I had known that shirt would look so good on you I would have let you wear it a long time ago," he teased her. She looked down, forgetting that she had been wearing it. "Oh, Mulder, I'm sorry, I just couldn't find anything else to wear." "Scully, I'm just teasing you," he answered. "Take it easy. You can wear it anytime you want. Besides, it shows off your legs." She looked down at her legs self-consciously. "Come here for a second." She walked over to the side of the bed so that he was sitting in front of her. If he leaned forward, his face would be buried in her stomach. He instead reached his long arms out and stroked the backs of her legs from her knees to her thighs. She trembled at his touch. "Mulder," she whispered, her voice shaky, her eyes closing, "we need to talk." "Now?" he asked, smiling slightly at her reaction. He had never dreamed that he would be touching her like this, but now that he was, he wasn't about to let her go. He moved his hands up, slightly inward so that as he got higher, his thumbs would be on her inner thighs. She gasped. "Let's go back to bed," he suggested. It wasn't hard to acquiese. TUESDAY - 8:00am SEASIDE MOTEL When the actual morning came, Scully opened her eyes and found herself in Mulder's arms. She felt calm and relaxed. She didn't want to move, for fear she would wake him. Instead, she tryed to move her lower body so that he leg was in a more comfortable position. Mulder opened his eyes and looked at her. "Awake," he murmured huskily, "finally." "What do you mean?" she asked. "I woke up almost 30 minutes ago. I've been watching you since then and I'm having a really hard time keeping my thoughts and intentions pure." A smile played across his face. "Mulder," she said, "I hate to be the one to rain on the parade, but--" "Look, Scully," Mulder said, sitting up in bed. "I don't want to hear that you think this was a big mistake. I don't want to hear that we should pretend it never happened. Those would be lies. You know it. I know it." Scully looked down, then back up at him. "I love you, Dana." Scully swallowed the lump that was forming in her throat. She nodded her head slightly, not trusting her voice. He touched her cheek gently. "I've always loved you." Mulder kissed her lips tenderly. "Oh, Mulder, I, God, Mulder..." she was crying softly, tears of joy and shock and of stunned pleasure. She had known it, too, but had always been too afraid and too stubborn to say it. "I love you, too," she said, finally releasing the emotions that had been growing for the past two years. "I know," he smiled at her. TUESDAY - 11:00am FAIRHAVEN HOSPITAL They were back at work. Except the quality of their time together had been altered dramatically. They tried not to have any physical contact in public. When they had been at the hotel it had been hard enough to leave the room. Instead, while they were out they exchanged knowing glances at each other. They ended up at Fairhaven Hospital towards the end of the day. They wanted to talk to the Director of Nursing, hoping that Scully could somehow carry on a medical conversation with her and find out a little more about the reasons why patients were so highly medicated at the hospital. "They're obviously psychotic," Mulder said to her in a whisper as they waited in the hallway. "Mulder," she whispered back, "I haven't seen one psychotic patient since we got here." "Probably because they're all so drugged they can't move," he whispered back conspiratorally. Just then, a man came racing down the hall. Two orderlies and a nurse chased after him, yelling for him to stop. "Come on," Scully called to Mulder as she took off down the hall, her foot throbbing in an angry response. Mulder raced after her and passed her quickly and easily. He went around the corner and down the hall. Within moments, he was alone in the hall. He could hear muffled yells, and kept turning corners, thinking he must be lost. The hospital had so many hallways, so many corridors, so many corners to turn, it's no wonder the people who reside here are insane, he thought. He felt like a mouse working his way through a maze. The interior of the building had changed. Mulder had recalled the administrator saying something about part of hospital being under construction. Sure enough, the next corner he turned, Mulder saw plastering material and concrete blocks. There were construction barriers up everywhere, making the halls harder to maneuver through. He kept running though, sure that he would be catching up to the voices he heard just ahead of him, thinking that he could be of help. But as he turned the next corner, he realized he was in a construction area and that the yelling was farther away. He stopped running to catch his breath and bent over slightly to relieve the ache in his side. He was breathing heavily and lifted his head to see the man standing not ten feet from him. He held what appreared to be a butter knife in his hand, and Mulder looked into the man's eyes, trying to remove the attention from the knife. "Hey," he said to the man as casually as he could. "What's going on?" "Mulder?" Mulder suddenly heard Scully's voice. She was nearby. Mulder wanted to call out to her, to tell her not to come crashing around the corner, but he didn't want to startle the man, either. Too late. Scully came around the corner and the man dropped his knife and grabbed her arm. "Hey!" she shouted, seeing Mulder, and struggling to get free of theman's grasp. What happened next was in slow motion for Mulder, but it actually happened very quickly. Scully reached for her gun, but before she coulf get to it, the man, seemingly possessed of great strength, picked Scully up and slammed her into the wall. Mulder heard the same noise that he heard in his dream as Scully's head cracked against the concrete, and he gasped. The orderlies came around the corner as Scully slumped to the ground, unconscious. Blood dripped down the wall. The orderlies tackled the man and the nurse injected him with something. "Call an ambulance!" the nurse yelled down the hall over her shoulder. Mulder stood completely still, in shock. Scully was on the floor, her head limp and to one side. The nurse went to her, turning her gently. Mulder saw matted blood in her hair. It was obvious that she was very terribly injured. Mulder finally was able t o move and rushed towards her. "Scully," he said, his voice choked. "Don't move her," the nurse commanded him and Mulder shrank back a few feet. He watched, paralyzed by his fear, until the paramedics arrived. Scully's eyes were closed. They hadn't opened once. Mulder couldn't take his eyes off her body. He could hear sirens approaching. The ambulance. What seemed like moments later, three paramedics were on the scene. They swiftly took over. One was talking to the hospital on his radio while the other two examined her and reported their findings. "We have a white female in her late twenties to early thirties, head trauma, possible skull fracture. She is not conscious at this time. BP is 80 over 40, her pulse is 50 and thready, resps are 50.." The other two paramedics were fitting a cervical collar around her neck, keeping her head steady. "Mackie 12, put her on a board and try not to jostle her until we can get her here and take some x-rays." "Memorial Hospital, this is Mackie 12, we are also going to have to intubate and bag her. She isn't responding at all the 50% venti-mask of oxygen we're giving her. Her pulse ox is 54%." "Mackie 12, go ahead. ETA to Memorial?" "About 12 minutes," the paramedic responded. "We'll see you then." Mulder saw Scully's eyes flicker open. He pushed his way to her side, oblivious to the paramedics around him. She mumbled something. "Scully?" he asked, but her eyes closed again. "What'd she say?" the one paramedic asked the other. "I don't know; something about believing." Mulder watched them load her gently onto the wooden backboard and even helped carry her into the ambulance. It had seemed that her eyes were focused directly on his face, and he thought she had said, "I believe." It was sinking in to himall at once. No, Scully, damn it, I don't want you to have to believe because of this, he thought. He was almost in tears, trying to keep up a brave front in case she opened her eyes again. But she didn't. "You a friend of hers?" one paramedic asked him finally. "I'm her partner. She's an FBI agent," Mulder answered. "Come on," the paramedic invited him aboard, and Mulder jumped into the ambulance, taking his place next to Scully but out of the way of the paramedics. One medic tipped Scully's head back slightly and held up a plastic tube to the other one. "A 6.5 French," he said, and the other paramedic wrote it down. The medic used a metal handle to open Scully's throat and deftly slipped the plastic tubing into her mouth and partially down her throat. He pushed the endotracheal tube into her mouth and down her throat. "It's in," he said, and was handed the ambu-bag. He placed the mask over Scully's face, carefully attached it to the device. He began to squeeze the bag rythmically. The other paramedic was inserting an IV cannula into Scully's wrist. Mulder watched this with no sign of emotion. MEMORIAL HOSPITAL WASHINGTON, D.C. Mulder was directed towards the waiting room as soon as they got into the emergency room. His mind was spinning. "I want to go with her," he told the doctor who seemed to be in charge of Scully's care. The paramedics were talking her into an exam room, and nurses and technicians had descended on Scully's body. "Sir, you'll have to wait out here until we examine her." "Damn it, I'm an FBI agent!" Mulder swore. "Sir, I will come out and talk to you as soon as I have examined her," the doctor assured him, his tone firm. "Right now I need to be in there with her." Mulder went into the waiting room and paced. He didn't know what to do. One of his choices were made for him. About fifteen minutes later, Skinner strode into the waiting room. "Agent Mulder, I got a call that Agent Scully was brought in here unconscious. What's going on?" "She has a head injury. I'm waiting on the doctor to tell me more," Mulder answered. "Do you want to tell me what you two were doing when this injury occured? I thought you were on a routine case." The doctor walked out then, cutting off their conversation. "I'm Dr. McCarthy. Agent Mulder," he said, addressing Mulder, "and you are?" "Assistant Director Walter Skinner with the FBI," Skinner answered tersely. "How is Agent Scully?" "It's pretty obvious from my exam that she's got a skull fracture, but we're waiting on x-rays to confirm that, as well as what I believe is a fractured shoulder. Whether or not there has been injury to the brain, we're not sure yet. We're going to take her in for a CAT scan in the next few minutes to see if there has been any bruising, swelling or any bleeding in or around the brain." "It's that serious?" Skinner asked. He eyed Mulder, who didn't seem surprised by this. Instead, he had a look of utter sadness and exhaustion on his face. The doctor nodded. "After the CAT scan, our next step is to determine what kind of brain damage we're talking about here." Mulder's heart sank. Brain damage? He didn't even want to imagine it. His chest was going numb, and the tingling was moving to his arms and legs. "She has been in and out of consciousness, which is a good sign. But we won't know quite how to deal with her until the results of the CAT scan come back. It could just be swelling, which can be relived by a delicate but highly successful surgical procedure. By the way, we need to know who Ms. Scully's next of kin is so we can obtain immediate authorization for treatment." "Her mother, but she doesn't know what happened yet," Mulder said. "I'll sign." "I suggest, Agent Mulder, that you get a hold of her mother and have her get down here as soon as possible," Dr. McGovern advised. "With injuries like this, there is always a chance of the patient not pulling through. At the moment, I don't anticipate that happening with Ms. Scully. But I'm not God, and I don't want to take any chances. We are going to go ahead and induce her into a semi-coma state so that the CAT scan can be more accurate. You can see her before we do that if you'd like." Mulder nodded his head weakly. He had to sit down. All he could think about was Scully, the woman he loved, lying in his arms just a few hours ago. And now she was lying intubated with a head injury that could very well take her life away from him. Once again, Mulder cursed himself for not having been honest with her about his feelings sooner. If she died now, he only would have had one night and day with her instead of the lifetime he had been dreaming of. Dr. McCarthy walked away from them, leaving them to talk. Skinner looked at Mulder. Mulder's face was pale, his eyes sunken and hollow. Skinner remembered him looking much the same way when Scully had shown up in the emergency room the previous year in a coma. "Agent Mulder," he said in a low voice, "I can call Agent Scully's mother if you'd like, unless you want to." He felt a certain peace whenever he dealth with Margaret Scully, and he knew that speaking with her would help him somewhat, and he hoped that it would help her as well. God only knew that in the past two years she had been given so much to deal with: her husband's death, Melissa's death, and Scully's disappearance. And now, Scully's possible death. The more Mulder thought about it, the more he thought that maybe he shouldn't be the one to break the bad news to her. "I guess you should call," he said to Skinner. Skinner nodded. It was a phone call he hated to have to make, but he knew it was his responsibilty. He respected Margaret Scully, and knew that she was a good woman and would handle the situation with her usual dignity. He left Mulder to his thoughts so he could make the call. As Mulder was looking for a chair, Dr. McCarthy came back out. "Agent Mulder? You can see her now, but only for a few minutes," he said, motioning Mulder back through the triage area. Mulder followed him to an exam room, where he pulled back the curtain. Mulder was stunned when he saw Scully. So much activity was going on around her body, he was amazed that she was still and silent. She was lying on a gurney, the cervical collar still in place around her neck. She was wearing a hospital gown, and had three separate IV lines running into her arm, as well as a larger IV line running into her juglular vein in her neck. She was hooked up to an EKG monitor that intermittently beeped and produced a printout of her heart rate, and the intubation tube was still in her throat, hooked up to a respirator that was breathing for her, making as rasping sound as the pump moved up and down. Her skin was milky white and her eyes were closed. Parts of her red-gold hair were shaved off--no, Mulder realized, they had just been pulled back so that the electrodes for the EEG could be placed. The EEG was monitoring her brain waves. Mulder was almost afraid to get close to her side, for fear he might dislodge something. But he did, inching closer to her until he was next to her, looking over her. He touched her arm, careful not to disturb any of the IV lines, and felt the same softness that he had felt hours before, when they had been back at the hotel. A terrible sense of grief washed over him, and tears, unbidden flowed down his cheeks. He couldn't do anything to help her, and this devastated him. Hebent his head and kissed her forehead gently. "Scully," he whispered to her, not knowing if she could hear him or not, "I love you." Mulder stood at her bedside and continued to weep, unaware that Skinner had walked up and was standing directly behind him, observing the scene in silence. MEMORIAL HOSPITAL SURGICAL WAITING ROOM TUESDAY, 11pm Mulder sat in immobile silence in the waiting room with Skinner and Margaret Scully. There was nothing for any of themto say. They were waiting for Scully to come out of surgery. The CAT scan had shown a large skull fracture, but no intercranial bleeding. However, the fracture had caused swelling and pressure on the brain that was dangerous. So they had whisked her into surgery around 7pm, to try and remove some of the pressure on the brain. Mulder had not seen Scully before the surgery, but her mother had. She came out in tears, having not seen her daughter at all since the accident had occured. She turned to Mulder for support. "She looks just like she did before, when she was in the coma," she cried. "They shaved a lot of her hair. Fox, she had such beautiful hair." Mulder nodded and swallowed hard. Skinner got up and came over to Margaret's side. "Mrs. Scully," he said, and she looked up at him. "I'm very sorry about what's happened to Dana. If there's anything you need, please feel free to let me know." "Thank you," she said, wiping her eyes. "Agent Mulder, please call me when she comes out of surgery," he said, handing Mulder a card. It was his business card. Mulder turned it over. There was a number scribbled on the back; his home number. "Thanks," Mulder said. Skinner left the room, leaving Mulder and Margaret Scully alone. Mulder knew he had to tell Margaret about their relationship, but he didn't quite know how. Finally, after another 15 minutes of silence, Mulder cleared his throat. "Margaret?" he asked, and she looked up at him. "Yes, Fox?" "I just wanted to tell you that....well, I care about your daughter very much." "Yes, I know you do," she said. "I...I wanted to tell you..." he trailed off. There was no good way of saying this. What was he supposed to say? Your daughter and I are in love, and she and I made love last night? He couldn't be so blunt. "Fox, I know how Dana feels about you. I probably know better than she knows herself. She loves you very much. You're not just her partner, her friend..." Now it was her turn to not finish her sentence. She looked up at Mulder. "She's been in love with you for a long time, Fox.." "I know," he admitted, lowering his head. "And you, Fox haven't fooled me for a second, just in case you were wondering. I know you're in love with her as well." He looked back up at her, expecting to see anger on her face, disappointment, perhaps, that he wasn't someone good enough for her daughter. But he saw nothing like that. Instead, he saw a hint of a smile. "We both knew, all along," he said, "but we were afraid to admit it." He thought about all the time he had wasted, all the time that he could have spent with Scully. "We finally talked about it last night," he said to Margaret, feeling his tears coming back again. Margaret Scully gave him a knowing look. "I'm sorry it wasn't sooner," she said to him. He looked at her, surprised. She looked back at him. "I've always thought of you as an adoped son, Fox." Her statement touched him, and he thought about the fact that he may now never get the chance to be her son-in-law. Scully was in the operating room, having brain surgery, for God's sake, and he loved her, and it wasn't fair. Tears again began to fall, and Margaret comforted him. ****** MEMORIAL HOSPITAL INTENSIVE CARE UNIT FRIDAY Mulder sat by Scully's side constantly. He occasionally thought about everything that had happened between them: the good times and the arguements, the differences of opinion, the crises that had somehow bound them together. And up until recently, they had shared their love. Mulder was determined that just as Scully's love had pulled him through so many times before, he would be there to pull her through this time. The doctors had said that the surgery was successful, that the swelling had been reduced signifigantly. However, she still had the skull fracture, and she was still not considered medically stable. She was still on the respirator. She had been in and out of consciousness, not recognizing anyone, and mumbling things that Mulder couldn't understand. Mulder had finally insisted that her mother go home and get some rest, promising to call her if there was any change. He stayed by Scully's side around the clock, sometimes dozing, always watching, always thinking. He was having a strange dream. He wasn't sure if he was awake or not, but he was aware of a woman's presence near him. She was speaking to him, and wasn't sure he understood her murmured words, but at the same time he knew what she was saying. He opened his eyes groggily to the sound of footsteps, urgent tones, and the wheels of machinery rolling nearby. He sat up straight in the chair beside Scully's bed to find doctors, nurses and techinicians by her bed, moving rapidly and efficiently. "Sir, please, you're going to have to wait in the hall," one of the doctors told him hurriedly. "What's going on?" Mulder asked, struggling to his feet. "What happened?" "The pressure to Ms. Scully's brain has risen and she's slipped into a coma. Her heartbeat is dropping and she can't breathe on her own. We have to intubate her again. Sir, please, if you can wait outside," the doctor repeated. "I thought the surgery decreased the pressure," Mulder said, his heart beating faster. "I thought she was getting better!" "Sir, if you could please wait outside, I'll come and speak with you as soon as I can." The doctor's tone was insistent. The flurry of activity around Scully was increasing. Mulder stormed out of the room, watching through the glass window. He could hear the doctor's voice talking to each other, their tones frantic. He ran a hand through his hair, staring at Scully. Come on, Dana, he thought, come on. You were coming back to me. You can't quit now. "No pulse!" one of the nurses called from the toom, and the red cart with the defibrillator was rolled close to the bed. "Charging!" "300 joules!" the doctor said. "Everyone clear!" He placed the paddles on Scully's chest, then her body jerked off the bed, then relaxed. Mulder jumped when it happened. No, he was thinking, no. "Still nothing," the nurse said, watching the heart monitor intently. "Charge again, go up to 350." Mulder watched this scene with a growing sense of horror. He suddenly realized what was going on. Scully was dying. And he was losing her. Right then, at that very moment, he was losing her. And a part of his could feel it. It was like a piece of his heart was dying, right along with her. It was the worst pain he had ever felt. The medical staff worked on Scully diligently for almost 20 minutes. Margaret Scully appeared suddenly at Mulder's side. "They called me," she said, her eyes filled with tears. She clutched at Mulder's arm. He motioned his head at Scully, and the doctors that were working on her. Silent tears flowed over her cheeks as she saw her daughter and the measures that were being taken to try to save her life. The doctor in charge came out and looked at Mulder and Mrs. Scully, taking off his gloves. "I'm very sorry," he said. "We did everything we could, but the pressure to her brain was too much. It cut off her supply of oxygen, and eventually got to her heart." "She's gone?" Margaret asked in disbelief. "I'm so sorry." Mulder backed away from the doctor and went into Scully's room, his eyes blinded by tears. The nurses were removing the tubes and wires attached to her body. Her skin was still warm to his touch. He ran the tips of his fingers over her eyelids, her lips, tears falling unabashedly. The nursrs wisely didn't say anything to him. Mulder tried to speak, wanted to tell her things, so many things, but the time was gone. He had waited to tell her so much, and now his chance was gone forever. The biggest part of him had just died. He remembered the headstone her mother had picked out for her when she had been missing. Now, they would have to pick out another one. Without Scully, he knew that a huge chunk of his life was over. And he didn't want comfort, not from anyone. All he could see was her face. Her beautiful blue eyes that would never open again. Her smile, the way it lit up her face. The way she would arch her eyebrow at him. The way she looked when she was under him, and she was moaning softly, her lips slightly parted, her eyes closed, her head tossed back. The more he looked at her face, the harder he cried. And it blurred to the point where he could no longer see it anymore.... MEMORIAL HOSPITAL INTENSIVE CARE UNIT FRIDAY "Fox....Fox." Mulder could hear Margaret, feel her arms on his shoulders. He opened his eyes and she was standing over him. "You're crying," she said to him. Mulder shook himself more fully awake. He sat up in the reclining chair. He was still in Scully's room in intensive care. The sky out the window had gotten dark. He looked up. There were tears on his face that he must have been crying while he was dreaming. Scully was still lying in bed, still hooked up to the monitors that were helping to keep her alive. And she was still alive! He remembered the woman's presence in his dream, and her words were suddenly clear to him. He knew what he had to do. He had never been more certain about anything in his life. "Oh, Scully," he said, jumping up from the chair, almost pushing Margaret away, hurrying to Scully's side. He looked back at her. "We have to help her back," he said. He had suddenly realized that from the bits and pieces of what Scully had told him about her coma, that she was likely still hovering between life and that safe place that she knew from the last brush with death she had. He knew, somehow, that she would be able to hear him this time. Mulder too Scully's hand in his. "Scully, I know you can hear me. I'm here with your mom." Margaret Scully came around the other side of the bed and took her daughter's free hand. "I'm here, Dana. I love you." She somehow felt that by doing this she was somewhat closer to Melissa, as well. "Scully, I know you feel safe where you are right now," Mulder said to her, feeling a breeze in the room. He could suddenly sense Melissa Scully's presence standing next to him, as sure as if she had actually been there. "But we love you, Scully. We want you to come back to us." He caught a quick look at Margaret. "I thought that night at the hotel was just the beginning for us, Scully. I want it to be the beginning." His throat ached with tears that he was keeping down. "I want you to be in my life, forever. I want you to marry me, Dana. I love you." He couldn't keep the tears back any longer. Margaret looked at him, nodded and smiled her approval. After a few more minutes, Mulder sat down again, exhausted. Margaret came to his side. "I just want you to know, Fox, that I couldn't be more proud of you." She squeezed his shoulder affectionately. "And I would love to have you as a member of the family." "Thank you," he replied weakly. As tired as he was, he wasn't planning on going back to sleep. No more dreams about Scully dying. He sat, and waited. Three hours later, while Margaret was downstairs getting coffee, he saw Scully's hand twitch. He jumped up. "Scully?" he whispered, stroking what was left of her hair. "Scully, can you hear me?" Her eyes flickered open slowly. He held his breath. This would be the moment of truth. This would be the moment when he found out if her brilliant mind had been damaged by the accident. He prayed not. Scully licked her dry lips and looked up at Mulder. She closed her eyes for a moment, then re-opened them. "Still want to marry me?" she rasped, and he broke into a wide smile. "Yes, of course!" he said to her. "You heard me." "Yes, I did," she answered, her words slow. "My mother..." "She just went downstairs for coffee," Mulder said. "She'll be right back." "I saw Melissa," she said to Mulder. "I know," he said, squeezing her hand. "She was here." Scully smiled weakly at him. "My head....so much pain." "You have a skull fracture. But you're going to be fine." He was thinking of a way to determine if she was suffering any brian damage from her accident, without alerting her to the possibility. "Scully, are you thinking clearly?" She looked at him directly in the eye. "Never clearer." She smiled at him, and he smiled back. Everything was going to be fine. ****** EIGHT MONTHS LATER ST. MARY'S PARISH Dana Katherine Scully stood anxiously in one of the choir rooms. Her mother stood behind her. "Dana, you look wonderful." "Are you sure?" Scully asked. She wanted to look perfect. She wanted everything to be perfect. In a few minutes, she would become Mrs. Fox Mulder, and when she met her husband to be at the end of the aisle, she wanted to take his breath away. Margaret looked over the off-white silk and lace gown her daughter was wearing. It had a fitted bodice with tiny iridescent seed beads hand swen on it. The skirt was full and touched the floor. It was nothing fancy, just another simple but elegant part of a simple wedding, just what her daughter and future son-in-law had decided upon. She had to admit, the thought of her daughter marrying Fox Mulder couldn't have made her happier. She had known for some time that they would end up here, if they would both have been honest and stopped being stubborn. She was incredibly grateful that Dana had been lucky enough to survive her accident, but knew that luck had a very small part in it. She believed that Dana's father and sister had been watching over her during that time. And she thought about her husband, about their wedding, and how in love the had been. If only he could have been here to see his daughter on her wedding day. "Honey, you're a beautiful bride," she said, hiding her tears of joy. Scully turned to look at her mother, unaware until that moment what memories the wedding was bringing up for her mother. "Thank you, mom," Scully said, hugging her carefully. She wished that her father could have been there as well. There was a rustling in the doorway. "Agent Scully?" Scully let go of her mother to see Skinner in the doorway. "Sir?" "I guess we don't have to be so formal today," he replied. "Ready?" She nodded. She was glad she had chosen him to give her away. It seemed right. She smiled one last time at her mother, and Skinner took her arm, leading her to the door to the back of the church where she was going to make her entrance. Mulder would be at the end of the aisle, waiting for her. She was suddenly very nervous. "You know, Scully...Dana...I wanted to tell you how pleased I am that you're marrying Agent Mulder," Skinner said quietly. "I knew about your feelings for each other long before you two told me you were engaged." "You did?" she asked, her face showing genuine surprise. "We tried to keep it under wraps." "I know you did," Skinner said, "and it would have worked if I hadn't already known." They reached the entrance to the sanctuary. One of her bridesmaids handed her bouquet over, and Scully took a firm grasp on it. She could smell the flowers from it and from the baskets that she knew were on the other side of the doors. White roses - her favorites. When she had come home from the hospital Mulder had dropped her off at her apartment and she opened the front door to find 15 dozen white roses in her living room, all in vases. She had been overwhelmed and touched. Mulder had told her that night that he had never dreamed he would ever love anyone the way her loved her. And now, just six months later, they were getting married. They were here in this church, with what remained of their families, a few close friends, and a few people from the Bureau, to exchange vows in a simple ceremony that would join them together as husband and wife. They had decided to write their own vows and keep them a secret from each other until the ceremony. Scully had not known what Mulder's vows were until the previous evening when she found a piece of paper with the vows written on them. He had grabbed it away from her before she got to read more than one line, "my reason for believing." Scully had known hers by heart for months. "I, Dana Katherine Scully, take you, Fox Mulder to be my lawfully wedded husband, through sickness and health, good times and bad, riches and poverty. I have never really known what it is to love someone fully, until I fell in love with you. It took me a long time to open my heart to you, but when I did I was given back more love and respect than I had expected. I promise to be with you always. Your need to search for the truth has become mine as well, and I will always be at your side in your quest for answers. I love you and cherish you, and will do so until the day I die." Skinner smiled at her, an expression she still wasn't used to. "You ready?" Scully nodded. Skinner opened the door and Scully saw Mulder at the end of the aisle. As soon as he saw her, he took a deep breath and his eyes were filled with wonder and love. He hadn't seen the dress she had picked out, and it was obvious to her from his expression that he was very pleased with her choice. He winked at her, and she smiled back at him. "I'm ready," Scully said, and Skinner led her down the aisle.